Notorious B.I.G. “Big Poppa” Translated

7 Aug

Real Lyrics:

[I love it when you call me big pop-pa]
Throw your hands in the air, if youse a true player
[I love it when you call me big pop-pa]
To the honies gettin money playin ****** like dummies
[I love it when you call me big pop-pa]
If you got a gun up in your waist please don’t shoot up the place
Cause I see some ladies tonight who should be havin my baby
Bay-bee

Translated:

I derive great pleasure when you refer to me as abnormally large father
Direct thy appendages towards the troposphere if you enjoy interacting with women in a divisive and manipulative manner.
I derive great pleasure when you refer to me as abnormally large father
To the women taking advantage of men, I say to thee, you’ve successfully exceeded their intellectual ability with your tomfoolery but more importantly,
I derive great pleasure when you refer to me as an abnormally large father.
If you’re bearing arms, please do not open fire as this is a public place in which many people would be injured or killed and I detect an abundance of females who should give birth to my illegitimate children, children.

Real Lyrics (third verse):

(How ya livin Biggie Smalls?) In mansion and Benz’s
Givin ends to my friends and it feels stupendous
Tremendous cream, fuck a dollar and a dream
Still tote gats strapped with infrared beams (whaat)
Choppin o’s, smokin lye an’ Optimo’s
Money hoes and clothes all a nigga knows
A foolish pleasure, whatever
I had to find the buried treasure, so grams I had to measure
However living better now, Gucci sweater now
Drop top BM’s I’m the man girlfriend
(Honey check it, (check it)
Tell your friends, to get with my friends (your friends)
And we can be friends
Shit we can do this every weekend (that’s right)
A’ight? Is that a’ight with you?
Yeah… keep bangin’)

Translated:

(What’s your financial status, Biggie Smalls?)
I reside in sizable homes and drive expensive foreign cars such as Mercedes Benz’s
Providing stable financial support to my acquaintances, it feels absolutely delightful!
We seem to have acquired an abundance of cream, so I believe that it is time to have sex with both a dollar and a dream.
Even after all this time, I’m still carrying stylish tote bags filled with guns.
Chopping large quantities of drugs into smaller ones in preparation for sale, as well as smoking high-quality cigars without regard to their potential health risks.
Currency, one who sells sex for said currency, and garments, that’s all I know.
You may call this a chowderheaded plan, something relatively imprudent, but I don’t give a fuck.
In order to avoid bankruptcy I was forced to sell drugs.
I’m in a much better place now, where I get to wear vibrant sweaters and drive convertible BMWs, I truly am the superior gentlemen, my dear lady friend.

Dearest, direct your attention to the following plan:
Inform your friends to make sexual advances towards my friends, and we can all friendly and jovial with eachother, by golly we could even make this a regularly scheduled appointment! Does that sound like a plausible plan? I sure hope so!

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2 Responses to “Notorious B.I.G. “Big Poppa” Translated”

  1. Luis October 20, 2010 at 9:49 pm #

    No… just… no.

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