Jay-Z To Release Memoir

11 Aug

J.K. Rowling's New Pal

Seems like people just fucking love memoirs these days. Among the many books being published by contemporary musicians, Jay-Z’s memoir will certainly attract the most attention.

Die-hard fans, along with elementary school kids searching for a “cool” novel to write a book report about can rest assured that they will rejoice upon purchasing Jay-Z’s new literary effort. Although there has not been much released concerning the contents of the memoir, many rumors have been circulating around the WTR? Headquarters and elementary school lunch tables alike. Of the many preposterous ideas, there is one that seems reasonable. According to an anonymous inside source, one of the chapters of Mr. Z’s memoir serves as an in-depth and comprehensive tutorial for proper “Shoulder-Brushing Etiquette”. Another chapter describes in great detail Jay’s first experience wearing a 40lb chain around his young and ambitious neck.

Interestingly enough, it has been confirmed that the audiobook versions of his new memoir will be enhanced with autotune.

Needless to say, Jay-Z’s upcoming memoir will without a doubt join “The Catcher In The Rye” and “Goodnight Moon” as one of the great literary classics of the last century.

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